Without going into the details, because I think that will just derail the discussion and I’m really looking for more of a focused answer, I’m wondering what kind of recommendation folks here have when it comes to dealing with an awful neighbour. Ours are verbally abusive in person and have recently started harassing us online by posting shit about us (at this point they have not yet named us, but we know without question that it’s us they are talking about).
Last week they actually got into a physical altercation with a friend who was yelling at them for something they were doing towards usand they assaulted the friend (he restrained himself from physically interacting with them, but was pretty verbally aggressive and eventually they struck him), which the friend did report to the police but without any request for charges. That altercation actually spilled over to an assault on me, by the strictest definition but barely so in fact, when I was pushed and they tried to take my phone out of my hand (I was filming what was going on to provide evidence for my friend if necessary).
The significant incidents with this neighbour are not many, as we have always tried to avoid them, but we feel that the notable ones are escalating and we no longer feel comfortable coming out of our house if they are there.
We now know they are capable of physical violence, although we don’t know if it would happen again, and we certainly know they are capable of emotional and verbal violence, which we don’t particularly want to experience but certainly don’t want our kids to have to observe it.
We also plan to report that recent physical altercation to the police, but we also don’t really want it to go anywhere since it won’t result in very much and will only escalate things further, in our opinion.
Other than the assault on me, as relatively low-grade as it was, I’m not confident that anything they are doing is illegal, yet, and I don’t feel like we have any leverage to stop them from engaging in the behaviours that they have demonstrated. In fact, if we were to try and confront them or exert any kind of pressure, we are very confident that this would further escalate. Obviously, if it got to the point where it was clearly illegal then we would again contact the police. But they can make our lives miserable without doing anything that is technically illegal and that isn’t pleasant.
So I’m wondering if anybody has experienced anything like that with neighbours and what they’ve done,, excluding vigilante justice because I don’t want to hear about how we should take matters into our own hands.
Would a letter to them from a lawyer putting them on notice or a complaint to the police about harassment, even though at this stage I don’t know if it would technically go anywhere, be useful? Right now, in the middle of winter, we are far less likely to encounter them because people aren’t outside enjoying the weather. But come late spring or early summer we already know that they will be out all the time and we will be unable to avoid them.
I should add that this is completely and utterly one-sided. We literally don’t want anything to do with them and try our best not to interact with them. Any interaction where we speak to them is always initiated by them and always starts out aggressively on their part over something out of left field that we don’t understand or that even seems relevant to both of us. So not only is the behaviour egregious, it is also bewildering. It’s not like we are constantly bickering or we are complaining about them or that sort of thing. They just decided at some point they don’t like us and now we annoy them just by living our lives and somehow they can’t stand it and lash out when they can.